After taking an inventory of how the year 2022 was for her, Grace had a big plan for 2023. On the 1st day of December 2022, she woke up early with a determined heart to draw out a plan for 2023. What kept ringing in her mind and ears were the words she’d always heard her father say: ‘If you fail to plan, you are planning to fail!’
‘I’ve got to plan! I probably couldn’t achieve much this year because I didn’t plan ahead’ She had told herself as she commuted down to the mall. She was determined that 2023 was simply going to be the bomb!
She walked with so great enthusiasm into the mall, picked up a lovely, big leather-bound journal, a pack of pens and some colorful markers. She also got herself a table calendar, an alarm clock and a planner. When she was done, she made the payment and headed back home.
While at home, she arranged everything she had bought on her desk, beautified the space with some flowers and lights and sat down to list out the things she would love to achieve in the New Year 2023.
‘I’d definitely start with God. I want a better walk with God this year’ She muttered to herself. So, she started to write the plans.
- Read the whole Bible through the year
- Wake up at 5am daily
- Stop drinking soda
- Write consistently on my blog every day.
- Eat a fruit a day
- Save 800 dollars every month
Now it is the 30th day of January 2023 and Grace can’t get a hold of herself. She had woken up at 10am that very day, rushed online for a meeting she was to have with her boss and had to quickly calm the raging worms in her stomach with a bottle of Cocacola and potato chips. The meeting was over in two hours and suddenly, the realization of her state dawned on her.
‘Nothing is working! Nothing is working! I hate myself! Nothing just works!’ She lamented as she threw the empty coke can into the dustbin.
‘I make plans and can’t just stick to it! I haven’t even read the Bible in two weeks now! The last blog post I published was when sef...?’ She asked herself as she quickly checked online to see.
January 6th!
‘Oh my! For someone who had promised to write every single day? This is terrible! I am as broke as anything, I have not even saved 100 dollas talk less of 800!’ She lamented on and on as the fear of failure gripped her already failing heart again.
----------------------------------------
Many of us are like Grace. We had great plans for the new year. We wrote some down, kept some in our hearts or even shared some with friends. We welcomed the New Year with so great excitement and enthusiasm, hoping that this would be the best year ever!
However, the first month of the year is drawing its curtains today and looking back, it just might not look like this is the year again! It might feel so dark and dreary. We might feel as though we can’t even do anything successfully, even if it is to ensure we wear our socks right. I am here to tell you not to give up! It is too early to give up now!
When we talk about the lack of discipline to stick to one’s new year resolutions, you are not alone. Millions of people around the world struggle with this as well. You shouldn’t sink into despair and give up on your goals. Don’t give in to the voices in your head that tell you’re the worst in the world. You can still end this month in a grande style! You can still stay true to and stick tightly to your New Year resolutions. It can still work. Let me quickly take you through a few tips that have worked for me:
EXPECT A FEW SLIPS
You need to be aware that a baby doesn’t walk in one day. When a toddler starts to learn to put his feet to the ground, he’d many times walk and stumble. He would slip and tumble. That doesn’t mean the baby is sick or not normal. That doesn’t mean the baby has problems or anything like that. It means the baby is growing! It means the baby is learning more about himself and his environment! If you do not expect some slips, you might not succeed at your resolutions. Do not have the ‘All or nothing’ mindset. Give yourself some allowances! Cut yourself some slack!
DON’T FOLD UP WHEN YOU FAIL
Experts say it takes about 21 days for a new activity to become a habit and six months for it to become part of your personality. It won’t happen overnight, so be persistent and patient! Let me use my toddler example again. When the baby falls, does he remain on the ground? Rarely! He’d pick himself up, giggling with excitement. He wouldn’t care about anything else-he is just too excited to be able to also walk about like mummy does, like daddy does! So, when you miss reading your Bible a day, don’t keep it in your wardrobe in dejection or out of frustration. Continue from where you stopped! If you missed your gym appointment for a week, don’t just fold up, resume again today! When you fall, and you stay there, that is where the problem is. You should rise up and continue from where you stopped!
JOIN AN ACCOUNTABILITY GROUP
Oh, yes! Or have an accountability buddy. Don’t run the race alone, for then, you would feel the whole world crashing down on you. When you run together with others, you become a team. You discuss your wins and failures. You cheer others up and you are cheered up. You give others some pushes, and you are pushed in return. You are aware that you are not alone and when you are about giving up, you find encouragement in your team. There are many accountability groups around you that you can join for free or even pay for. If you cannot find any, try to team up with a buddy then, preferably someone who has successfully been able to succeed, even if it is a bit at your goal.
CAREFULLY CELEBRATE YOUR WINS
Many times, we tend to over celebrate our wins. We are trying to lose weight, for instance. After two weeks, we have lost four kilograms, and we are extremely excited. So much excited that we decide to treat ourselves to some ‘goodies’- the same goodies that brought in the fat in the first place. That would be counterproductive! You have been successful at waking up at 5am daily for three weeks, so you decide to sleep till 9am today and maybe tomorrow. Soon, you will never be able to hear your alarm ring anymore! Soon, 9am would look too early to you. Celebrate your wins, but do it carefully. You were able to wake up early for a few weeks, amazing! You can treat yourself to a long, warm, well-scented bath at home or at a sauna. That’s a good enough reward! You were able to lose some good weight, treat yourself to some delicious fruit salad garnished with some nonfat greek yoghurt and granula. That should do!
RESTRICT YOUR ACCESS
Many times, we want to change a bad habit, but we still live close to the habit. We still smell the habit. We still have access to the habit. So, we have a daily, no, momentarily struggle against the ‘aroma’ of our bad habits! How do we get it done, then? Access to the bad habit has to be restricted! You want to save money, but you still have access to the card? You might never save anything then! Why don’t you go to the bank and place a restriction on your spendings? That might work to a great extent! You want to stop taking junks? Then, take away all the junks from your fridge! You want to stop drinking and smoking, but you still go to the bar to pass time? You aren’t ready yet, bro! When you are ready, you will restrict access to those things.
ARRANGE YOUR ENVIRONMENT FOR SUCCESS
To make sure your New Year resolutions works, you might have to put some modalities in place to help you realize them. Your environment must be arranged for success! You want to wake up earlier but find yourself hitting snooze every morning? Why don’t you consider putting your alarm clock on the other side of the room, with the volume turned up so loudly, so you will be forced to get up to turn it off? Or are you having trouble making it to the gym? Sleep in your gym clothes to make it easier to get out the door for a morning workout. Can’t stop snacking? Get the junk food out of your pantry and refrigerator and replace them with healthier options like fruits, vegetables, and nuts. This way, you will find yourself getting the bad habits out of the way, and you will find the good habits gaining roots.
So, hey buddy! I trust you have been able to gain one or two things from my ‘letter’ to you. I will be stopping here. I really do hope that you are encouraged not to give up now! I hope you believe more in yourself and your dreams now. I do hope you now know that those goals are achievable no matter what! I wish you a very successful 2023. I wish you great success as you shake off discouragement and attempt to hop on the horse again. See you at the top!
NB: It would be a pleasure to read from you in the comments below.
